Thursday, July 12, 2012

Secrets (Photo: Hajimeten in Hyogo)

When I looked at this photo this morning considering whether or not to use it for T.B., the word “secrets” popped into my head from out of the blue- well, maybe not from out of the blue…

Three years ago after Madi and I had broken up, I went to Japan and got interviewed* and during that interview I decided to tell the truth about my personal life and why we had split because I had always been doing that with My Little Dead Dick from the very beginning and I didn’t see why I should stop then, but when I revealed that it was because I had a crush on a famous Japanese photographer (nothing happened with her by the way), it was too much... Immediately I got hell from the "3F"s- friends, fans, and family- and especially, Madi who didn't know the real reason why I had ended things and sadly had to find out through the internet.

Anyways, people aren't supposed to talk about their personal lives in the public sphere especially in interviews... and I found out the hard way after I had done that. So for the next three years, I kept my mouth and private life shut. During that whole time, I hated myself for what I had done and at the same time for what I was doing. When the earthquake suddenly happened, I guess I couldn’t keep it in any longer as well, so I decided to be myself again and say everything that I had to say without any regard (well, at first anyways...), and fortunately that's how I began seeing beauty in my personal life again.

This was probably my last secret that I had been hiding up until now... and like most secrets, this one was about a girl.

*Coincidentally the interviewer was my current roommate Ian, who I had just met for the first time then.

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